Is wayne brady gonna have to smack a ...

I'm no pimp like Wayne Brady, but sometimes I too have the urge to want to smack someone. Here are a few reasons why.

ASSUMPTIONS. The easiest thing in the world to do is ask a question. If I dont answer, if I tell you thats not your place to ask, if I completely ignore you, so be it. But you asked. I have dealt with people that will have a legitimate question, but will refuse to ask. Furthermore, they draw some ridiculous conclusion based on nothing but and then assume some outlandish course of action that leaves me baffled. And it all could have been avoided by a 30 second string of questions and answers. You dont like me, you dont wanna hang out with me, you're mad at me. WTF are you talking about. 9 times out of 10, I wasnt, but now I am.

Assumptions part 2. You know, the ones that come with pre conceived conclusions. They ask you the question they asked in the first place, but arent really looking for an answer from you. They already have your answer in their head, but so they wouldn't look like they were assuming they ask you, just as a courtesy, but really dont give a damn what you say. That is still assuming!

Be Real. Everyone likes to do something. You may like ballets. I like video games. You may like to go out for quiet evenings at a restaurant. I may like sitting in a movies for 6 hrs, sneaking in to different theatres. You want to do something, say it. Simple as that. But when you come at me like... " Do you want to go see that new movie you've been talking about or go get some food?", my response will usually be,"We can swing by wendys on the way to the movies." Now you're mad at me because you wanted to dress up and go to M&S Grill and I didnt even ask you what you wanted to do. Problem is, you didnt tell me.
Better yet, you want to come over/have me come over. But this is the conversation we have...
You: whatcha doing tonight
Me: no plans, whats up
You: nothing, im just home chilln too
Me: o ok. I'm prolly gonna play around with this guitar or play this new game that came in the mail
You: o ok, have fun.
And then your mad. How about this here. Its real simple, I promise.
You: whatcha doing tonight
Me: no plans, whats up
You: nothing really, I just wanted to know if you wanted to hang out
Me: I dont really feel like going out, but we can chill here or there
You: ok, sounds good, lets set it up
Done and done. See how that changes everything. ESPECIALLY if i dont have plans. Seems logical right? I know you dont agree or else this wouldnt be a pet peeve because y'all would just do it! WOOOOSAH

BE REAL, part duex. Dont set a precedence that you dont intend to uphold. Dont come to my house cooking your first time over if you dont plan to come and cook regularly. If you do it the first three times your here, dont be upset when I ask about my dinner on your next visit. Dont get me wrong, I'll buy the food, spices, whatever you need, but I do expect some sort of meal prepared. And that does apply in other areas as well. O_O

You are no longer a guest if you live in town and visit me house more than four times a month. After that first month, you should know where I keep the glasses and you know very well whats in the fridge. Unless I am up, dont ask me to get you stuff. If we're both sitting on the couch, dont ask me to get up out of my comfort to grab you a glass of water. You aint no guest. Again, this is for regulars. If you live out of state and have only been by twice, ask and you shall receive. But once that new guest smell wears off, you on your own.

Now that I've told you these things I shouldnt have to remind you everyday. Thats another pet peeve. I hate repeating myself. If I find that I have to do this regularly, I just gonna let you think what you want. Its my job to let you know whats up, not to have to beat it into you until you choose to get it.

More coming soon...